These are MY rules for life. You may have your own or none at all. It's really none of my business what you do. If you disagree with any or all of these rules... Okay. My guess is that one day, many generations from now, the world's greatest scholars will attempt to interpret each Rule as written. To avoid world wide debate, discussion and probably a few wars, I have decided to define each in an effort to protect the future of mankind and promote world peace.
Rule #1 - Just be a nice guy and the rest will follow.
Rule #2 - Carry a baseball bat just in case Rule #1 doesn't work out.
Rule #3 - Don’t be a dirtbag.
Lying, cheating, stealing and bullying are characteristics of a dirtbag. Don't do that crap.
Rule #4 - Never compromise absolutes.
If you draw a line in the sand - don't cross it or allow it to be crossed. Keep your integrity in all situations and don't let others dictate your principles.
Rule #5 - Don’t be stupid.
Uhhh.... Just don't be stupid.
Rule #6 - Don’t be a pussy.
Keep your courage strong. Don't let fear overrun the desire to succeed.
Rule #7 - Eye on the Prize.
Resolve to accomplish a realistic goal. Decide on a course of action. Make it happen. Don't chase shiny objects along the way or let the process become derailed because the required steps take a lot of effort and focus. Know that there won't be a band of cheerleaders coming along daily to give you the rah-rah "motivation" to do the work. The prize is the only real motivation to do the hard, yet not always fun, work that is necessary.
Rule #8 - Remove the problem and there is no problem.
Detach from the source of stress. Could mean cutting ties in a relationship or giving up pizza. Could mean finding a new job or career path. If you aren't happy - find the source of the problem and fix it.
Rule #9 - Improvise. Adapt. Overcome.
Even when there is a great plan in place - things will go wrong. Don't freak out and panic. Regroup and find a way to push through. It's called perseverance.
Rule #10 - Save the drama for yo’ mama.
Nobody cares about the senseless gossip and whining. Life isn't always fair but most of the time it is fair when the situation is viewed honestly and objectively. If you feel slighted or are offended by something see Rule #8.
Rule #11 - Separate the bullshit from reality.
In times of great stress, sorrow or endurance simple tasks can seem impossible. During these times just take what you KNOW to be true and separate them from what you THINK to be true. Then refer to Rules 5, 6, 8 and 9.